We have a mechanism inside of our brain that analyses every one of our experiences, determines what it means and then stores the results in our bank of references. The process started while we were very young and has been going on ever since.
That is the process that allows us to perform automatically most of what we do during the course of our life. That's the process that allows us to drive a car almost automatically, to use our keyboard without having to search for the letters etc. However, that process also does a lot more.
That is the process that formed most of the beliefs that we have. It's where most of our personal views on just about every subject under the sun were constructed. These beliefs and views are neatly tucked up in our bank of reference just waiting to spring forth when the need occurs.
The problem with that bank of references is that most of it was already formed before we were three years old. That is to say that some very important evaluations were done before we were mature enough to do it. Hard to believe but true.
By the age of three, we had definite notions about love, about relationships, about money, about people and about just every imaginable subject. At the time, they were very embryonic notions but they established the basis upon which our beliefs were eventually formed and accepted as gospel truth.
Today, years later, that bank of reference is still being used to define our reality. As we developed, learned and grew, some of those beliefs were altered to adapt to new information but the original evaluations still play an important role in our belief system.
Without that bank of references we simply could not function. It is where our automatic reflexes are stored; it is through that bank of references that we can have a normal conversation without having to analyze the course of that conversation. It's the guiding mechanism for most of our actions however it is also were our beliefs are held.
Our beliefs are extremely important because they define our reality. As such, some of those beliefs are empowering and some are not. Some beliefs contribute positively and some are major roadblocks. Some beliefs are sources of inspiration and growth while others only contribute to difficulties and hardships.
We are the steward of our own bank of references and the overseer of our beliefs. It is for us to determine what is good and what is not; what should be kept and what should be changed.
It is to be remembered that beliefs are not cast in stone. They are simply notions that we have adopted for reasons that, in some cases, may be questionable and sometimes adopted before we were mature enough to make judicial decisions.
Some people where influenced, by the time that they were three years old, to believe that they were worthless and that they could never achieve anything worthwhile in their life. Years and years later that belief still affect and run their life in spite of tons of evidences to the contrary. That's a real tragedy.
Beliefs are simply notions that we have accepted and notions that can be questioned and changed. Changes may not always be easy because our mind has a strong need for consistency. However, with some determination, a disempowering belief can always be replaced by a positive one. That's how we grow, mature and become wiser and more effective.
by Dr. Raymond Comeau
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